so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize