To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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