That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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