Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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