# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
