She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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