Me. At least after what I've been through.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
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so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
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Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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