I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
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Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
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Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
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