she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
