What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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