; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
