She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
