Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Randomize