he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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