with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
