Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
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