He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
