yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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