He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
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Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
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Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry