I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!