Texts From Last Night

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  (848): View more from New Jersey

  I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa

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  (848): I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa http://tfl.nu/605l
  Replies (152) Good night (6218) Bad night (57947)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to

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  (507): drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to http://tfl.nu/z3ca
  Replies (14) Good night (3563) Bad night (782)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??

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  (317): There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas?? http://tfl.nu/74h0
  Replies (59) Good night (2087) Bad night (3309)
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  (646): View more from New York

  Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?

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  (646): Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself? http://tfl.nu/aacm
  Replies (5) Good night (773) Bad night (4773)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.

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  (919): You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume. http://tfl.nu/gckc
  Replies (46) Good night (13360) Bad night (1027)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?

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  (403): What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex? http://tfl.nu/y75a
  Replies (15) Good night (961) Bad night (4505)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.

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  (740): he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue. http://tfl.nu/53t4
  Replies (18) Good night (2479) Bad night (2012)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.

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  (864): I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened. http://tfl.nu/5edl
  Replies (4) Good night (2645) Bad night (1176)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.

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  (609): We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar. http://tfl.nu/d2sa
  Replies (5) Good night (3107) Bad night (797)
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  (408): View more from California

  A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.

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  (408): A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe. http://tfl.nu/7qkp
  Replies (6) Good night (1869) Bad night (1029)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!

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  (610): Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans! http://tfl.nu/q5t9
  Replies (8) Good night (1724) Bad night (801)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina

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  (706): I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina http://tfl.nu/j6ze
  Replies (12) Good night (2327) Bad night (885)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?

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  (561): Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club? http://tfl.nu/vdph
  Replies (10) Good night (984) Bad night (452)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.

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  (401): also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part. http://tfl.nu/nmg6
  Replies (9) Good night (711) Bad night (359)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?

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  (816): Would you still love me if my nipple fell off? http://tfl.nu/cwwj
  Replies (5) Good night (224) Bad night (425)

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