i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
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