i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
