Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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