The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
