I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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