I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
