I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
