My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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