He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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