were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize