I CAN MOONWALK!
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Come share oat with me in your robe
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
