Jerry, you need to find god
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
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