Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Don't EVER smell your tampon
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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