I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Where are you guys?
Drunk
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize