He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Randomize
