There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize