Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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