i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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