"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
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I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
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it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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