Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize