Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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