that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
