He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
worst night to have a conscience
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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