Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Randomize
