Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
