____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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