she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
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