I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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