ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Randomize
