My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize