Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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