and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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